It has been 2 years~*

After months of pain & agony pure joy and wonderful experience in blogging, 52newdays has finally hit her two years Anniversary. I am in disbelief. Within two years, I don’t know exactly what I have achieved as a blogger. One thing I know is that I am still kicking around and aging maturing. Now come to think of my blogging journey, I have gone through several phases and discoveries on this bumpy road of fame. So why don’t I list them out here to reflect some awkward moments learning experience:


“I don’t know what the heck I am doing” phase
I believe most people started their blogs not knowing what they wanted to blog about. Heck everyone has a blog and it looks like loads of fun, I get to write about stuff and there are these supposedly “followers” who read my blogs and make me feel like I am famous. I might as well jump on the bandwagon and start my own and go from there. In my case, the only thing I knew at the time was the fact that I was a new mommy in town and I was about to gaga with the lovingly motherhood duties so wanted to have a bit of my “me, myself and I” time in remembrance of who I once was before the sweet new title of mommy took over my life. That was it. Heck, I blogged about craps that made me laugh so hard now just to look at my early day posts. Quite embarrassing indeed.


 
“I am your BFF” phase

Blogsphere is a wonderful platform to “digitally” connect with people of all sorts with a few strokes of your keyboard. We instantly connect with words we type, brief conversations we exchange, words of encouragements we share. Wow I didn't realize I could be so friendly!!  “Hall of Fame” phase Most of us can’t deny that once we get the idea of blogging and get the hang of it, the follower hunting season promptly follows.  We all do it.  Been there, done that.  Who doesn’t want to gain more readership? Who doesn’t want their blogs to be read by thousands of readers? Thishunting game building connection with fellow bloggers can be fun but it is exhausting too. Giveaway, follow me and I’ll follow you and all kind of self-promotion tactics are classic. Oh yes, I have been there and I have done some of those too.   “Reviews/Sponsors Fun” phase  When your blog has gained certain level of popularity, most likely you will be approached by sponsors/companies. Getting free products or a form of monetary compensations are quite exciting.  Holy sh*t, I might be able to live off this blog without working my full time job!!!!  Wooo-hoooo, what a dream.  At one point, I had so much fun working with various companies with product reviews and paid blog posts but in the past few months I happily declined ALL of them. YES – ALL of them. Am I crazy?!?!? The word “FREE” is still my most favorite word in the world but I also realized that the loss of my joy in blogging was not worth the free stuff when I felt obligated to blog. If I was so darn lazy that day, I would still have to drag my b*tts to sit in front of a computer to do a blog post. I don’t have anything against bloggers who do this but I personally feel it kind of ruins the fun of blogging and slowly turn the blog into a job which I don’t want it to be at this point. In the future, I may do this again when I am more committed.   “Passions found” phase  Blogging helps me discover two of my biggest passions: photography and writing. Though I am not the best writer in the world  “I must blog” phase  I was not sure what the heck got me into thinking that I had to blog frequently to meet the demand of blog readers. Oooh, I have to blog daily to keep the flow of readers coming..the more the merrier! Oooh I don’t blog for a day my total pageviews would drop significantly! I felt like I was on a competition of some sort all the time! Who I was competing with?!?!? C’mon, I am not Lady Gaga or a celebrity. People don’t care about every single move I make. And really, who truly care if you disappear for a month? Get over it. (and yes I got over it)      “Depression Era” phase  After weeks and months in blogging, I felt my blog didn’t go anywhere. In fact, where did I want it to go? I wish I would have 1,000 followers, 500 pageviews each day and all those fancy numbers to look at. When reality is not quite as bright, it is easy to be fed up. Blogging blues made several visitations to me last year to the point where I questioned myself why in the world should I care about it. It was not my job. It was not my source of income. Followers are readers were not my family members. Blog was just a blog and it was supposed to be my hobby…my channel of expression, not my life. If no one reads it, then be it.  “I quit” phase  Quickly following a depression era in blogging but obviously blogging is too addictive, I can’t quit – lol.  “Blog by me & read by me” phase  Not that I know the art & science / the in &out of blogging to its core but I have come to understand my wants/needs with blog a little more now. This is the stage where I have been after I made my blogging resolutions earlier this year [here]. Since then my blog frequency has slow down, my weekly pageviews/statistics significantly drop but I feel more at ease with blogging than before. I keep a small ring of network with a few favorite bloggers and visit a few new ones when I feel like discovering new blogs to read.  Prioritizing other things in life and put blog at the bottom of the list.  I no longer feel the need to carrying my camera around to snap every moment of my life / every dish I consume / every outfit I wear / every piece of accessories I purchase / every place I go / everything I see because I feel that the “need” to take photos / an urge to share with the world have taken away the true joy of our private moments. There are things in life you can’t capture with a camera…those are things you must capture through your eyes and keep as your lasting memories. There are things that other people are not going to understand but only you will.  I have learnt to draw a fine line and manage my time between living my offline life and enjoying my online life which I think is essential. It took me almost two years to be where I am today. I can’t say that I am 100% entirely satisfied with the way I blog or know exactly where the future is held for this blog. This moment I am happy sharing a bit and piece of my life/passions/dreams/hopes and frustrations through writing and photography , and that’s all it matters.  Happy 2nd Birthday to you, bloggy!!